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The Lord Ruler's perfect capital city, Luthadel, is doing the impossible: rebelling. Skaa half-breeds are being taught the power of Allomancy, something that the Lord Ruler's obligators said only existed in the nobility. The enslaved skaa, with their murderous benefactor, now fight back against a living god's oppression.

So, the Inquisition was formed. The nobles begin to fear assassination from all sides. The times of nobility Mistborn killing each other are over. The Steel Inquisitors look for aristocrat traitors and insurgent skaa, and the skaa try with all their strength to merely survive. The Lord Ruler's perfect Final Empire is slowly devolving into chaos.

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Mistborn Series Brandon Sanderson
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Zero - Skaa Pewterarm


3 replies to this topic

#1 Zero


  • Skaa Pewterarm

6
Riordan Casuana's Reputation
  • Age26

Posted 27 November 2018 - 03:44 PM

Zero
Type of Character: Skaa Misting



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Name/Handle: LordKronos
Contact: PM Please






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Name: Zero
Type: Skaa
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Place of Origin: Luthadel
Occupation: Unemployed, but freelances as a mercenary/bodyguard - he is a member of the Skaa Rebellion
Relationship Status: Single






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Type of Powers: Misting
Metals Used: Pewter
Degree of Skill: Intermediate
Status: Hidden - but known amongst members of the Skaa Rebellion/Snapped






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Zero stands at 5’10” tall. He is strongly built from physical training that he received after snapping. Zero has brown hair, wears a beard, and has one blue eye. The other eye was lost and he wears an eye patch over the socket. Due to his size and eye patch, some can find him intimidating.Trained as a bodyguard, he stands like one, seeming to take in as much of the room as possible. His clothing is purely utilitarian. He wears plain pants and shirt, usually with leather armor underneath.


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Zero has a rough exterior, but it houses a heart of gold. He has a hatred towards noblemen for what they did to him and his mother. Seeing the nobility and the Empire as one and the same, Zero has a desire to see the Empire fall. Watching his mother die has caused him to have a semblance of PTSD that usually manifests in an easily roused temper. Meeting with Alistair has helped this problem. Alistair has taught him to trust again, and it has built a strong loyalty to those he considers his friends, yet he prefers working alone or in small groups. When not working with the Rebellion or freelance jobs, he enjoys having a drink or two at Skaa taverns (he prefers ale to wine), sparring (often giving tips if they are members of the Rebellion), or listening to stories. Zero responds tentatively to people he doesn’t know; it takes time for them to gain his trust, but they are not met with hostility until he sees them as a threat. Friends, on the other hand, are met with a grasping of arms, a hug, or a drink if Zero is at a tavern. Zero is attracted to women, but hasn’t ventured into any romantic relationships. He isn’t opposed to romance, but hasn’t felt a need to make that step in his own life. In a room, Zero will often make sure he can see as many entrances as possible. He dislikes having his back to the door, and if a chair isn’t available, he will stand. Zero prefers action to words, but is not afraid to speak his mind, especially if it has to do with security or defense, which he sees himself as an expert in.

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Special Skills: (For example, things like Reading, Writing, Knife Fighting, Lying, Observation, etc.)Zero is fair combatant, especially with his hands or a staff. He is good with the sword and daggers, but prefers to have a staff in his hands.

Strengths: (Try to make strengths and weaknesses relevant to your character. Try to tie them into your character's personality, experiences, relationships, etc.) Zero is physically strong. Despite his hard exterior, he actually has a very kind heart - at least for skaa and the disenfranchised. He is extremely loyal and protective of his friends and allies.

Weaknesses: Zero has a temper - especially when he sees children being mistreated. It often takes someone else talking him down to avoid metaphorically (or literally) cracking skulls. He tends to stick out because of his eye patch, so often avoids being stealthy. He rarely sees the point. Zero has a blind side on his right due to his lack of an eye. Zero is also illiterate. He never saw a reason to learn how to read.






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Zero Tesril was born in 892 in a skaa slum to a woman named Mara. Zero has never met his father and has no idea where he is located or his name. Zero knew his mother well and loved her dearly. He had a very typical skaa childhood, but was well developed for his age, and was often given physical tasks to complete, such as lifting and shoveling ash out of the streets.

At age 10, his life changed forever. Night had not yet fallen and the mists hadn’t come, but a nobleman was drunk and set his eyes on Mara. Zero wasn’t sure what happened when women were taken by the noblemen, but he for sure knew that they didn’t come back afterwards. Filled with rage, Zero tried to prevent his mother’s abduction. He ran through the city, trying to find his mother. Finally finding her, he ran to take her back.

The nobleman struck quickly, knocking out Zero’s eye with a dueling cane. Left for dead in the streets of Luthadel, Zero snapped. There had been trace elements of pewter in his stomach as he was hit, and a seeker member of a thieving crew discovered him, and nursed him back to health utilizing pewter.

The seeker’s name was Brayd Lind. Through Bryad, Zero met Alistair Zevros, another skaa thug. Alistair taught Zero not only how to burn pewter, but how to fight. Alistair started with martial arts and then proceeded to the staff and the sword. Zero showed a definite proficiency for the staff and focused on that.

Zero served briefly in the thieving crew, usually as a door guard. His eyepatch made him stand out, so he didn’t often go on raids. He wasn’t heavily involved in the scamming. At age 18, he left the crew on good terms and joined the Skaa Rebellion. As he grew, he learned of the fate his mother would have received at the hands of the nobleman. His anger had seethed and with that came a hatred for noblemen that could not be soothed. His personal experience in getting attacked as a child gave him a heart for children, and this combined with his hatred of noblemen could often lead him to make rash decisions if there was no one to hold him back.


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Rage was the only emotion that Zero felt. He had taken his mother. Zero didn’t know who he was, but the man was a noble. Zero had watched. Noblemen sometimes took women with them. He didn’t know what had happened to them, but he did know they didn’t ever come back.

Zero wasn’t going to let that happen. His mother wasn’t going to disappear. He ran through the streets of Luthadel. Even as a ten-year old, he was strongly built from physical labor. He also swept and shoveled the streets clear of ash and knew them well. It didn’t take long for the boy to catch up. Mara Tesril saw him first.

“No,” she yelled at him. “Run!. Get away!”

Zero didn’t listen. He couldn’t listen. The nobleman knew he was there now though. Switching his mother to his other hand, the nobleman struck him in the face with a dueling cane. Pain flashed through his right eye. Zero scream and fell to the ground, feeling wet blood in his hand as he brought it to his face.

Zero’s mother screamed, but he couldn’t hear it over his own. The boy pulled himself up to his hands and knees. His vision was blurred, and his hand left a bloody handprint on the cobblestones. Inside of him, he felt a power that he didn’t understand. Zero noticed a white orb on the ground nearby and when he figure out what it was, he vomited.

Zero didn’t hear the man approach him, but he heard him speak. “Quickly Alistair, he needs pewter. He’s running out.” There was a brief scuffling as a dark haired man lifted his face, almost shoving a vial of liquid down the boys mouth. “Drink it, son. It will help. Trust me.”

Zero felt that power again - larger this time. “Burn it,” the dark haired man said, and Zero noticed another man for the first time - Alistair he assumed. “Your body knows how to do it. There ya go!” The man smiled at him, as he blacked out.

Zero awoke in a bed. The dark haired man sat next to him. Zero sat up in the bed. “Here,” the man said, handing him a vial of liquid. Some type of sediment sat at the bottom.

Zero found himself trusting the man. After all, he had taken him in. “What is it?” Zero asked, after downing the liquid and sediment.

“Pewter,” the man said. “It’s what kept you alive. We’ll teach you more later, for now, suffice it to say, you’ll need it until you fully recover.”

Zero nodded, his hand going up to his right eye. Over it was a leather patch. “My eye is gone?” Zero already knew the answer.

The man nodded. “There was nothing we could do to save it. My name is Brayd.”

“Zero,” he responded standing up.

The pewter inside of him made him feel stronger, and Zero flexed his hand, feeling a new strength inside of him. It was a sort of warmth that he had never felt before.

“I’m hungry,” Zero said, heading to the door. “Is there any food?”

Abruptly Zero ran into the door. That was impossible. It had looked farther away than it actually was.

“Slow down, son,” Brayd said to him. “You can’t see as well as you used to. It will take time, but you’ll adjust. Come on, let’s get some food in your belly.”

Zero followed Brayd to a kitchen, where he sat down to eat some baywraps. He would have a lot to learn indeed.
**********
Present Day

Zero moved quickly, burning a bit of pewter to keep his balance. His opponent’s staff whizzed by an inch from his body. His opponent, a soldier with the Skaa Rebellion name Grizz grimaced.

“I thought I had you there,” he said.

“I’m full of surprises,” Zero responded with a smirk.

Zero spun his staff, and moved forward, striking high. His opponent blocked the attack, and Zero countered low, hitting the man on the leg. The man fell to one knee.

“Yield,” Zero said.

Grizz raised a hand. “I yield”

Zero moved his staff to his left hand and offered his right to Grizz.

“Always remember, if you know where one end of the staff is, you know where the other is also. The staff being a harder weapon is all in your mind.”

Grizz smiled and thanked him, and two more stepped into the sparring ring, not offering their names. Zero didn’t recognize them, but they were Skaa. He’d be willing to spar regardless.

“Bet my friend over there,” the taller of the two said, pointing in the crowd, “that we both could take you. He seems to think you’ll get the better of the two of us. I offer this challenge.”

Zero smiled and took a defensive stance. “Loser buys drinks?”

The smaller frowned. “But there are two of us…”

Zero’s smiled widened. “That means if I win, I get two drinks.”

The men laughed at that, but readied their staves to fight. Both attacked at once, Zero shifted his position to take on one at a time. The smaller moved towards him and Zero blocked his attack and countered with a move that pushed the smaller man’s weapon to the ground and setting him off balance. He then brought his own attack to the larger man. Zero attacked high as he had in the match with Grizz. The other man countered down, showing that he had either been paying attention to the fight with Grizz or he had more experience. Zero blocked and spun around the other trying to get to a point where he could see both of his opponents again, however, the smaller man had recovered fast. These two had clearly worked together before, and the smaller had made his way to Zero’s blind side. The two ended up running into each other.

Lord Ruler, Zero thought. I hate that blind side. Such a rookie mistake!

Getting tangled was enough for the two to surround Zero. A few more blows were traded before Zero yielding.

“To the tavern then. I owe you boys a drink,” Zero said. “Just remember, I want a rematch.”

Edited by LordKronos, 02 May 2019 - 03:18 PM.


#2 Comatose


  • Shard of Brain Inactivity

354
House Raisaal

Posted 01 December 2018 - 08:54 PM

Hi Lord Kronos!

There are some very interesting elements to this character - I am excited to work on him with you. Sorry for the delay - thank-you for your patience.

Some of my comments are small changes. The main substantive thing I'd like to see is a little more flesh on the personality section. Right now "angry at the world, but overall a good guy" doesn't give us much to make him distinctive. I'd advise you to try to think about what makes him who he is - how has his mother's death, or his relationship with Alistair changed him? Did being an only child shape him in any way? What does he do for fun when he's not fighting or on duty? What are his opinions on different aspects of the empire? How does he treat new acquaintances or old friends? Does he have any interest in romance? Is he an introvert or an extrovert? He is rarely afraid to speak his mind -but what thoughts and opinions does he speak - when is he more likely to do so?

Those are a few questions that I hope will be useful prompts, but feel free to include whatever you want. The personality is really what makes a character distinct, and provides a useful road map for how to play them when responding to unexpected situations in the RP. I often refer back to that part of my character sheets to figure out how my characters should be reacting when I am uncertain.

While it's less important than personality, under appearance you could also include how he is perceived - is he intimidating? How does he speak, what does his voice sound like? How does he stand and move? What is his wardrobe like? Thinking about these things should help you flesh out the character, and give people something to reference when they are writing about seeing your character in the RP.

That aside, I really like the concept overall, and just have a few minor comments:
(1) Skaa don't have surnames - just one name per skaa character.
(2) Role Play Sample - What you have is good, but we don't get to see much of Zero's personality or what he's like at play here. Part of this is because he's being acted upon, rather than acting. Also, the scene is quite dated and we usually prefer the RP sample, or at least one part of the RP sample, to be close to present day, especially for younger characters, so we can get a sense for what they are like now. I think you could include the scene you have now as part of your history, and write a new RP sample of Zero doing something in his present capacity as bodyguard/mercenary.

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#3 Zero


  • Skaa Pewterarm

6
Riordan Casuana's Reputation
  • Age26

Posted 13 February 2019 - 11:10 PM

Edited - let me know if you need more!

Edited by LordKronos, 13 February 2019 - 11:10 PM.


#4 Moru

231
Tineye

Posted 22 July 2019 - 05:05 PM

I really love the concept for Zero. He's well thought out and I love the eyepatch. I also like the edits you have made to the character and I think you addressed what Comatose mentioned very well. (I'll let him make his own judgment on that of course.)

Thanks for being patient with us for our responses,also.

I only have one comment. I'm going to approve him, but I'd like you to think about his special skills section a bit more. So I think from his years of being a body guard he'd pick up more than the physical skills. Maybe consider how he judges people to be safe or not for the people he protects, and how he evaluates places he goes for their safety, etc. He would probably also be very street savvy.

Since he's a bodyguard and a Thug, and he's still alive, we get an idea of the fact that he's good at what he does, but just maybe highlighting those skills other than physical would be nice to note.

He's got an approval from me, though!


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